Need and Want
by MandalaMarigold
Summary: A possible conversation between Robert and Cora, to bring an end to the Bricker affair.


AN: I've had a fair bit of free time on my hands over the past couple weeks, so I've had time to mess around with another "what happened next" fic. This one takes place around a Cobert scene in episode 5.6, when Cora goes to Robert in his dressing room. The scene is embedded in the fic but I don't do anything with it, just before and after. There is a lot of conversation in this one, which I'm trying to get better at writing, so please bear with me.

Just taking these characters out to play, everything and everyone belongs to the keepers and creators of the show. I will say the rating is T (for suggestion). Thanks for reading, Enjoy.

* * *

"Is everything alright M'Lady?" Baxter asked as she scooped up Her Ladyships clothing off the end of the bed. Cora had been unusually quiet lately, appearing distant and often distracted by her own thoughts.

Cora looked up from the lotion she was absent-mindedly massaging in to her hands. "What was that, Baxter?" She furrowed her brow mildly annoyed at being pulled from her thoughts.

Baxter mistook Cora's expression as irritation for her impertinence. She blushed and ducked her had. "I'm sorry M'Lady, I forgot myself."

"Please," Cora encouraged her, softening her features. "What were you asking?" Cora stood. She liked having a lady's maid that was nearly as tall as she was, this woman knew so much about her, physically, and intimately, and it felt nice to be able to look her in the eye.

"I was just wondering if everything was alright," Baxter quickly looked towards His Lordships room and back again. "With His Lordship."

Cora smiled sadly.

"I just mean," her maid trailed off, and when she spoke again her voice was weaker, almost sad. "Things seem a little different now."

After a moment, Cora spoke, "It's true." She nodded. "Things are different." She paused and looked over to the dressing room door before looking back at her maid. "It's complicated Baxter."

Baxter nodded, making sure to maintain eye contact with Her Ladyship. "I understand." Her soft voice sounding more sympathetic than usual, "I'm sorry to hear it, M'Lady."

Cora smiled her well-rehearsed, apathetic smile. "Thank you, Baxter." And Cora moved to turn her back to her maid, indicating the conversation was over.

Baxter bid Her Ladyship a goodnight and quietly pulled her bedroom door shut. Cora, distracted once again by her thoughts, walked towards to the dressing room door straining to hear if the murmured conversation between Robert and Bates had finished. Waiting, she rested her hand on the doorknob.

Bates' hushed voice wished His Lordship a pleasant night, and although it was muted Roberts voice sounded jovial enough when he replied in kind to his Valet. A door thudded closed.

Cora swallowed thickly, suddenly feeling uneasy. She wasn't nervous with the conversation she was about to broach with Robert, but how he might respond. Blood rushed through her ears and her heart felt as though it were crashing into her ribcage. She sighed deeply and straightened. Summoning her courage she pulled the door open, and then pushed in through the second.

* * *

Of course Robert knew that Cora was telling the truth. Initially his rage had clouded his judgment but in his gut, and his heart he knew she was speaking the truth the moment she told him that 'nothing had happened.' It was his brain, and his mind, that wouldn't allow him to make proper sense of it all. His imagination ran wild with hurt and anger. He was galled that his wife had allowed herself to become emotionally vulnerable to Simon Bricker, naïve to his advances and subverting herself for his attention. Despite Robert's vain attempts to detract her, he endured their flirtation; but the final blow to his ego was seeing them together in 'their' room, standing intimately close to one another. His possessiveness bore the form of jealousy, and that night he became enraged, igniting his petulance, making him sullen and obstinate.

SCENE

* * *

After Cora left the room Robert's mind flooded with memories, many of them linked to women that he had, indeed, flirted with over the years, and suddenly he felt ashamed. It was true that women had trifled with him, whether it was Lord Grantham the man or Lord Grantham the title that they desired, he couldn't always be sure. The same could be said for his wife, regarding the flirtatious efforts of other men, she was engaging and attractive, drawing men to her without even trying. So perhaps, they were equal on that score? However the difference between them was how they behaved, when one of them piqued the interest of someone else. Cora was always able to maintain her composure, trusting Robert and the strength of their marriage, simply resigning her annoyance to a glare or a roll of her eyes. Robert, on the other hand, struggled to manage himself, despite trusting his wife's commitment his whole demeanor changed, and he became insolent and churlish.

He sighed as he pushed the covers back, recognizing the pattern in his behaviours and conceding that he had been treating Cora quite unfairly. Robert let a half-smile inch up his face remembering that it was Cora who was his first "flirtation that got out of hand".

The farthest he had ever gone, outside the boundaries of his marriage, was with Jane, their former housemaid, and Robert couldn't help but ask himself 'what did Cora know?' What would he be confessing to by going to her room? He shifted to the edge of the bed contemplating his next move. As his feet settled on the cold floor his mind considered another motive Cora may have had for insisting he rejoin her in her room. They had been sleeping apart for over two-weeks now, and before that his childishness and obtuse behaviour had reduced their intimacy to naught. Cora had seemed quite demanding, and he wondered if maybe her insistence was related to a primal need. When he considered his own needs, his self-assessment revealed an ache for her, and that part of their relationship. He grimaced with doubt, Cora was usually quite direct about these things, but as he weighed the possibility he wondered if their current marital strain could have made her more subliminal.

* * *

Cora was sitting on the edge the bed with her hands gripping the mattress. She turned her head slightly, acknowledging his presence. Her defeated posture made him wonder if she had been crying, as there was a moment when she stood at his door, that she nearly succumbed to her emotions. A pang of guilt went through his chest and tugged on his heartstrings. He dropped his robe over the chair and padded over to the bed.

Cora had allowed her tears to fall when she returned to her room, but she was working at regaining control over herself when he walked in. She stared down at the floor in front of her feet as the heat that had erupted deep in her chest began to spread up her neck and engulfed her usually pale skin with a crimson hue. Her heartbeat hastened. Robert's presence confirmed his own guilt, at least to a point where it matched her own.

She heard a quick rustling of fabric, which pulled her from her thoughts. When she heard it again she turned her head, moving her eyes to the bedding, which from her periphery remained intact. Cora shifted on the bed, moving her head to look over her shoulder at Robert, who had begun to unbutton his shirt, as though to take it off.

"Robert," Her brow furrowed. "What are you doing?" The look of bewilderment that covered her face would have made him laugh had the state of their relationship been any different.

"I'm getting in to 'your' bed," he looked up at her with brazen annoyance. Robert's eyes bore into hers as he finished undoing the last button.

Cora stood up quickly, spinning around. "Robert!" She held up her hand, her wedding band glinting with a spark of light from the fire. "That is not what I want."

He pulled his shirt open, and dropped his arms at his sides, his expression unreadable.

"If that's what I wanted," she took a step backwards, "I would have come to you sooner." Cora shrugged, "I would have been more clear." She became slightly annoyed with his presumptuousness, and after 2-weeks of enduring his petulance it was her turn to be petty and unkind. "If that is all I wanted I would have slept with Mr. Bricker."

The insult was like a slap, contorting his face, and she knew that she had hurt him. "Then why am I here, Cora?" He asked indignantly, doing his best to keep his voice down.

Regretting her derision, she exhaled heavily. When she spoke again she was calm, her tone softened. "Because I miss you."

That was not the answer he was expecting, and it caused him to recoil with surprise. She went on, "because of what happened to Edith today." She swallowed past the burn in her throat. "Because…I need you."

He sighed, "Cora," saying her name a little sing-songish.

"You don't realize how lonely I've been, Robert." She watched him. His mouth dropped open a little, his face adorned a puzzled expression. "You have been pushing me away for months," she continued.

He tried to interject a weak protest.

"Months! Robert." She spoke firmly for emphasis and then paused giving him a chance to speak, but he remained silent. She closed her eyes and went on, "So many times I tried..."

"Darling..." Finding his voice, he started to interrupt again.

"Until we're in here," referring to 'their' room. "And you're frustrated with this, or that," she moved her hand for emphasis. He followed the shinning gold of her ring. "You vent your frustrations and rage about your grievances, leaving me to contend with your mood." She had his attention. He was listening, and the look on his face told her he was concentrating on her words. "And you use me." Cora looked away as her voice cracked, "...when it suits you."

The room fell silent; the only sound was the fire cracking loudly behind her.

"Cora, I…" he spoke softly. "I'm sorry."

She began speaking again as soon as he stopped. "It isn't just you though." She shrugged, looking back up to him. His eyes, full of sorrow, watched her. "It's the girls. It's everyone. It's life." She lifted her shoulders weakly. "Everybody seems to have something exciting going on." She paused, "and I've got the same old village charities, the garden show, paying calls, and I've got you…And you push me away." She finished matter-of-factly.

"But...we..." He started and stopped.

Cora lifted her chin, tilting her head back slightly, knowing what he was about to say. "Oh, I know Robert, this is what we do," she looked back at him. "But this time it's gone on far too long."

He sighed and looked away from her.

"And then comes along someone nice, who shows me a bit of attention." She crossed her arms over her chest, gripping her forearms.

"Please, Cora!" Robert scoffed, instantly annoyed, his eyes snapped back to her face. "It was more than a bit."

Her pupils flared with irritation as she continued speaking, her tone unchanged. "A person who wants to spend time with me. Who wants to know what I thought about things."

Robert knew what was coming next.

"I'm smart, Robert!" Her expression turned despairing. "At least, I'm smart enough to have thoughts and opinions." Her voice lowered, as did her eyes. "I felt valued." She swallowed audibly, "and respected."

Robert heard Sybil echoed in her mother's voice. He could see that Cora was now fighting back tears. "You are…I know you do," he stammered. "My Darling…I respect you." His final thought sounded more like a question.

He shifted, and sensing his movement on the other side of the bed, she quickly looked up and simultaneously lifted her hand to stop him. "No!"

Her voice kept him rooted where he stood. "Cora!" He looked exasperated and wanted to curse. "I'm here!" Raising his voice for emphasis.

"That's right." She looked at him sadly. "You're here."

Robert paused, realizing the trap he had just walked in to. He swallowed thickly and shrugged with a slight bow of his head, acquiescing.

The silence in the room was deafening. They watched one another, their eyes conveying things they would never be able to vocalize. Cora's eyes flooded with tears and she blinked quickly, trying to hold them in, but a single tear escaped and rolled down her cheek.

"Have?" She stopped, wondering if she really wanted to know the truth. "Have you ever…" Her voice trailed off, leaving her thought unfinished.

He cleared his throat knowing the exact question she was trying, and had every right, to ask it. Robert answered quickly, without hesitation. "No."

Cora was aware of the rumours. Her previous maid was like a sieve, and purposefully did a poor job of hiding gossip that seemed particularly scandalous. Yet she desperately wanted to believe him.

She didn't say a word, however her eyes betrayed her as her eyebrow twitched, revealing a hint of suspicion.

"No!" He answered again, more assertively. "I swear to you, on our Grandchildren's lives, Cora" he added for emphasis. "No."

Cora looked down and she closed her eyes with relief. Her stiff features relaxing enough for a small smile to settle on her lips. Robert hesitated, however decided it best to go to her. She heard him fidget and then start to walk towards her. With her head bowed she inhaled deeply and pushed out her misery as she exhaled. He was closer to her than he had been in weeks, stopping short of where she stood.

"Cora…" He hesitated. "I don't know where to begin?" He paused again, sighing. "I don't know what to say?"

"I don't want to talk about it," she said softly as she looked up, into his eyes. Her countenance confused him. "You're here." She offered to ease his perplexed silence. He was standing close enough to her that she inhaled his heady redolence. "I don't want to spoil this." Cora tilted her head slightly and gave him a gentle smile. "I've missed you!"

Eventually he reached his hands forward, a magnetic urge to touch her pulsating in his fingertips. Roberts strong grip slid around her upper arms, his thumbs landing in the crooks of her elbows.

They watched each other again; their unspoken emotion was profound.

Cora was the first to speak, breaking their intimate silence. "I'm glad you didn't stay away." Robert narrowed his gaze as he watched her. She reached forward and grasped at the open lapels of his shirt. Tugging slightly, she slid her hands down to the first button. She watched him, watching her.

Cora fiddled with the button, pushing it through the buttonhole and into place as Robert repeated her last words in his head, wondering if he was imagining the air of seduction in her voice. He slowly moved his hands down her arms, capturing her wrists. He pulled her hands from his shirt, bringing them together, and to his lips. He kissed her knuckles.

"Cora," he kissed her hand again, feeling the cold metal of her wedding band on his lips. "I am sorry."

Her eyes held a somber glow as she blinked her gratitude, and she allowed her smile to deepen, accepting his apology. Robert pulled her arms up and draped them over his shoulders. "I've treated you badly," he said as he pushed his hands around Cora's waist, pulling her body closer to his.

She grinned, savoring his warm body next to hers; "you compared me to the dog."

He tilted his head back with a laugh that rumbled through his chest. "Please forgive me, my darling." His loving eyes connected with hers, before leaning in and gently pressing his lips into hers.

They broke apart, ending their kiss with breathless resolve. Robert leaned away, gently pulling her in the direction of their bed. Cora pulled back, holding on to him. "Robert," she wearily searched his eyes. Knowing she had no proof of innocence other than her word. "You are all I have ever needed, or wanted...Please believe me."

"I do, my darling," he whispered as he leaned in to kiss her cheek. Robert's lips lingered and he pressed another kiss to her jaw before whispering in her ear, "I want you too."


End file.
